Categories

Shitposting

Low Effort by Ian Rand McKenzie

Naturally Arrogant #2

We don’t torture our prisoners, we just give them the opposite of fun.

Me, if I were a Gitmo prison guard

Naturally Arrogant #1

I do indeed operate at a higher level than most beings in this universe. I’m just a dysfunctional mess because I like the challenge.

Character Capsules #1

“Pack it up, you sneaky prawns! I’m trying to cook dinnah!”

Character Capsules is a series where I attempt to encapsulate an entire character in a single expressive sentence. Inspired by films where rich characters are needed to briefly inform the life and/or background of the protagonist.

Quotes As If I’m Relevant #1

In a crowd where everyone is doing nothing but screaming like lunatics, the person doing interpretive dance is the only one being heard.

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AGHKGH! [email protected]&# OFF POPUP!

Sorry, sorry! I just thought since you've been on this site for longer than average, you might hear me out?

Why do you do this to me, Ian...

Okay, okay, I'll be quick! I have a newsletter to keep you up-to-date on my content and projects. If my stuff tickles your pickle, help us both out by subscribing!

Also, I don't do anything shady or aggressive with your email address. I'll only send you the good stuff and won't share your email with any person/provider that isn't working for me to serve you better.

'Serve me better.' What deliciously vague jargon. Is this where you pretend to be me and you make me respond with a contrived form of consent because you're bold enough to assume this cute little chat interface gimmick is enough to actually get me to sign up?

Ummm... uhhh... ahh... Sign up and get exclusive discounts and early access!!!! Come ooooon! Induced scarcity is fun!


...alright, well, I'll leave it up to you.

Ian's Creations

Enderbook

The social app for Minecrafters. Share creations, follow friends, set up trades, & live chat.

Art & NFTs

Much like the poetry, another vehicle for humor, social commentary, & occasional beauty.

Homicide App

Arbitrary gatekeeping systems like laws, morals, and forceful intervention make murder more difficult than ever. With Homicide.app, murder from the convenience of home!

The Meme Hotline

Serving dad jokes over automated voice and meme text messages via SMS completely toll-free!

Objektiv Digital

Making websites for successful local businesses. The most effective one-man-agency you'll likely ever find.

Like this nav? It does what every marketing-oriented web designer will tell you not to do: shove as many things in your face as I can!