Low Effort by Ian Rand McKenzie

The only person luckier than a lottery winner is a lottery winner that says, “no thanks” when presented with the cheque.

No matter how far you travel, the crossroads travel with you.

What does a racist, white supremacist, and pharmacist all have in common?

Authoritarians use a bad economy to convince you to give them their power. Meanwhile, the act of survival is the most noble profession. Yet, bad economies cannot take that away from you. That’s reserved for authoritarians.

What do you call a psychotic man spraying spit as he rambles incoherently on the street? A spritzophrenic

What do you call it when Jesus Christ throws a temper tantrum? Making a nativity scene

What do you call a cookie that doesn’t like talking to you? Shortbread

What do you call a red headed baker? Gingerbread man

What do you call a cougar encounter when chopping down a Christmas tree? A Christmas stalking

What do you call a winter Ukrainian strike on a Russian convoy traveling through the forest? Christmas tree armaments

What do you call the most powerful vacuum component in the world? President Franklin D. Roomba-belt

What do you call a bag of potato chips that travels the world in a single night giving gifts to children? Krisp Krinkle

Decentralization is freedom. Centralization is authority. One will always over-correct and it is up to us to fight for the underdog — whichever it may be.

At a no-name university, a student inquired to his English professor about his poor essay grade. The professor always felt threatened by the student’s raw talent. “Reading the paper, completely nonsensical,” the professor dismissively responded. “Please zip it up, sir, your modifier is dangling,” the student replied.

I’m standing in a field of something. I see less today, but the warmer it gets, the less I’ll see tomorrow. What kind of field am I standing in? [Answer] This kind of only works in spoken word without completely giving it away.

“I am an entrepreneur of last resort.” — Grae King

Value is subjective. A golden Bugatti is useless during a famine, diamonds are overpriced through monopolized scarcity, and time spent enrolled at Harvard is better spent networking than learning.

Performing the same action and expecting a different result is the definition of insanity. We can thus conclude all software developers are insane.

Moral & ethical tech is the only path forward for success. The whispers will soon become an ear-shattering roar. —Me, hopefully being correct.

What did the pig say to the slaughterhouse manager before changing careers? “If you can’t handle me at my bratwurst, you don’t deserve me at my black forest!”