I relieved myself today. How many times? Not once Not twice But thrice! I did yesterday as well. Again, how many? Not once Not twice But thrice! Can you guess how many the day before? Not once Not twice Not even a single slice! And do you know how many days I didn't find reprieve? Not once Not twice That's right, thrice! For whatever reason that it may be For three days I am not free Happening pretty much weekly This is my shitty trinity
I do NOT like to be interrupted. Just kidding, I love it! Some people will cringe Tell you to shove it But, as you'll see That's not me To share a jolly good time Just for you, I'll speak in rhyme But, as you may have deduced Sadly, my mind is reduced To channeling my inner sage And scribing inks on this page Certainly, I mean not to be rude But I must keep brief, this interlude I hope by now your faces wear a smirk Because I really must return to work
I'm not racist I am a good and righteous man Laid out and executed my plan But then the world didn't bend their knee Now I think it has forsaken me I never said the n-word Except a couple of times singing along to a song But I don't do it anymore, I now know it's wrong And when I see the word scrolling in the chat I say nothing at all and think, "good for me, I don't do that" I'm not racist That's the words I spoke My eyes open, I am performatively woke I slap on a BLM sticker Actions are hard, buying something is quicker I'm not a misogynist A man asked my manager a question She answered, he looked at me, a weird situation I repeat her answer, he's satisfied I shrug my shoulders and say to her, "you tried" I'm not racist Obama is so cool Hitler was a fucking fool Yeah, black people make less cash But, what about white trash? I'm not a lone wolf I see discrimination from sex to religion to racial I will put an end to it all because I'm special I will orchestrate the death of all evil I am the guillotine, the constitution, the gavel I am a good person I benefit from my hard work I am a glowing light in the murk I paved my own road with my father's quarry While others paved theirs with hardship and worry I fight the power for those who cannot My journey was hard and I will fight hard to stay Thank God cops weren't stopping me along the way I use my wealth and riches for comfort And send a pittance to the antifascist effort I am not a white supremacist How could that possibly be? Look at the stats, Asians are smarter than me And the highest achievements in sports isn't fake We all know them being black isn't a mistake I'm not racist But we all know white men built our society All the roads, cathedrals, and efficiency And where they are not present there seems to be Violence, crime, and poverty I'm not racist That's what I say Because I think it's action and not a way Then one day I learned we take systems for granted I don't even know where the food I eat is planted I never said the n-word And I think that gives me social clout All the while, I never called that shit out All my gamer friends, casually tossing out the slur While I sit uncomfortably without even a whisper I'm not racist I am on your side, I even think I'm an ally But, what do I do when I see yet another black man die? On his family's wounds, I pour salt Asking questions framing that it was his fault I don't support the patriarchy Getting off when defending her honor Like I'm a women's rights marathoner While I am completely losing sight That I'm using my white supremacy to win the fight I'm not racist I speak my virtue with statements and aggression Then subvert it all with the odd question What about this, that, and the other? Casually dismissing a brother I'm not a lone wolf And yet none of my heroes are real Tyler Durden, John Wick, the Joker, all these men that don't feel Anything other than pure rage Masking their supremacy with virtue, I turn another page I am a good person To be fair, my struggle may be real But I completely ignore how others feel I'm climbing a mountain, somewhere in the Appalachians at best While my brothers and sisters are somewhere around Mt. Everest I fight the power for those who cannot I'm broke as fuck now, but I know I'll build my empire Will I do it with blood and exploitation and fire? Oh, but it's for a righteous cause, I tell myself Will I use my power for good, or to remain on the top shelf? I am not a white supremacist I come up with anecdotes that signal that I'm not Repeating disingenuous stats like I'm some kind of robot I have to justify my existence until I die Were all my victories just a lie? I'm not racist Yet look at all the great things Europeans have done While I ignore that the laborers did it at the end of a gun I post a meme of a French cathedral next to an African shack Yet I never questioned: built with whose blood and broken back? Oh, fuck, am I the bad guy now? I say I'm not racist because I don't try to be Now I'm racist just for being me This is so unfair, I'm just a regular guy This American dream is just a lie I'm fucking racist Now what? March on the capitol? Put on a uniform and start my patrol? Shoot up a school after having a bad day? Maybe just take a blue pill and get out of the way I'm racist and now I know it I want to change but don't know how to show it I'm a lesser victim of supremacy and patriarchy While I was getting called a nerd, you were getting called darkie The whole world is fucked up and we're poised for change I'm openly racist, saying that sounds strange Said with a humbled heart and open ears Please tell me your truth, and struggles, and fears Or don't, I won't fret There's always the internet Just tell me when I pull some white people shit I'll shut up, get on my phone and Google it We've all suffered from "the man" And me propping him up was his plan You've gotta be fucking kidding I am no longer doing his bidding It's not your responsibility, it's mine Like learning to drive to avoid a traffic fine But we all have car horns used to beep So please give it a bump if I act like a sheep
When you look, you can plainly see How amazing our culture can be With its noble moral dispositions And fair and balanced coalitions Yet, other times, when you look and see How far we can fall from the tree Casting aside faith and tradition For a monetary-driven mission Where you must pay a spiritual fee For health and happiness, pain free If you cannot afford it, don't ask why Stay in your place until you die Or, you can open your eyes and plainly see How much better our culture could be Please join us as we get up and shout "Fuck this complacency, in and out!"
I think I'll push the button today To make my feelings sway From scarcity and fear To celebrating with a beer I just might push the button, I will Faith in knowing I'll get my fill Scarcity abandoned, say goodbye I now see with a fresh new eye When I push the button I know I can make myself glow Filling empty stomachs without being a glutton All it takes is the push of a button
I believe many things And I know a lot less I believe my mood swings I know I suffer from stress I believe the Earth is a sphere I know I don't care I believe we act from places of fear But I know love is there I believe one day we'll find our way I know that facing fear leads to loving I believe love is here to stay Despite all our pushing and shoving I believe many things And I know a lot less But if I believe in loving things My knowledge, God will bless Yet, I don't believe in God, not really ...unless love is God Go ahead, call me silly A foolish, sad sod I believe what I believe And act on what I know Keeping my beliefs on my sleeve And rain or drought, reap what I sow I believe many things And I know a lot less No matter what your heart sings Knowledge isn't what your ego will confess
I am but a lowly fool Living under benevolent rule Of a person appointed by God Living by the grace of their bejewled and golden rod I give them the gift of all my grains And their God blesses me with quenching rains That hydrate my throat and thirsty fields That bless my ruler with greater yields Sometimes the rain washes out my home Flooding comes and goes, a divine metronome My ruler does not come to my aid For I left our God unpaid See, while I was plowing dirt And mending my tattered shirt I was unable to go to worship Forsaking God for land stewardship So, our ruler of God, heavenly ordained Punishes my sins, leaving me pained In this act, devoid of love and heart Our leader is damned, torn apart But not sent to a fiery abyss Instead, burned by the lessons they failed to reminisce They forgot the only commandment from their God above To live their life with nothing but love And now I gaze upon my leader's wrath Untaught of putting love in my path So here I am, plotting while I sit About how this leader's throat will be slit
I'm puttin' up a swastika sticker Makin' my hate dick grow thicker Post a video, make everyone hate me All the while, I grow ever more lonely Turns out, I wasn't full of hate I was just trying to sate The attention that no one gave Please just give it, it's all I crave See, when people like me do this for fun The most desperate ones pick up a gun They shoot up crowds, then blast themselves Will you help me keep my guns on shelves? I'm a broken lost soul I'm losing control Of all my sanity And sense of dignity I'm a straight white male, they say I have luck But I was raised in a world where no one gave a fuck All I need is an education on how to be a man To be given some confidence and a plan While I'm out here, spreading controversy and bait I could've been a soldier for a better fate For you and me And our country But I was raised by screens Pixels were my only dreams I found a like-minded crew And we all began to stew About how the world hated us How it threw us under the bus It didn't matter if it was true or a lie Not in our echo chamber? Bye, bye We're dangerous children In the body of men No one showed us the love we need to share And for who we are now, they wouldn't even dare But maybe you can craft a different fate One-on-one, call out our hate And not from your high horse, towering above Be a fellow man, and say it with love
Some say there's danger On the highway to hell My story is much stranger As you'll soon know well For my highway wasn't to fiery pits The fiery pits were already there See, I was bringing my kits To a sulfuric demon, my wits beware This demon could snap my neck with two flicks But, I have what I now know Would save me from his tricks It's to stroke his ego So equipped on my person Woven words that would end Harm coming to fruition By singing demonic legend So at a crossroads in hell I made a deal with a demon And now, forever I'll be well Life is light, and words are my beacon
I've gotten pretty sick Of all this politic We all seem to fight Over black and white Why doesn't anyone say That the world is mostly gray The real red pill is found In finding a middleground Nobody will ever hope For a slippery slope All we need is to release The idea of covering the slope with grease They say we'll suffer the communist That we're already suffering the capitalist I've got an idea for you It's that both are true When we think in such extremes We'll surely find the means To endless self destruction Away from equality's construction
Do you normally dislike poetry? Me too! It turns out I like writing it, but I cringe at the thought of the stereotypical puffy culture surrounding it. If I want to smell my own farts all day, I stuff my belly with garlic and onions, thank you very much.
Anyway, if you want more poetry without all the stuffy pseudo-intellectual silliness attached, subscribe to my newsletter below. Unsubscribe at anytime. I respect your time by respecting mine. I don’t send frivolous bullshit.
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Brave Verified Creator
Sorry, sorry! I just thought since you've been on this site for longer than average, you might hear me out?
Why do you do this to me, Ian...
Okay, okay, I'll be quick! I have a newsletter to keep you up-to-date on my content and projects. If my stuff tickles your pickle, help us both out by subscribing!
Also, I don't do anything shady or aggressive with your email address. I'll only send you the good stuff and won't share your email with any person/provider that isn't working for me to serve you better.
'Serve me better.' What deliciously vague jargon. Is this where you pretend to be me and you make me respond with a contrived form of consent because you're bold enough to assume this cute little chat interface gimmick is enough to actually get me to sign up?
Ummm... uhhh... ahh... Sign up and get exclusive discounts and early access!!!! Come ooooon! Induced scarcity is fun!
...alright, well, I'll leave it up to you.
Like this nav? It does what every marketing-oriented web designer will tell you not to do: shove as many things in your face as I can!
