A Joke Too [Knockoff-TikTok] to Be Funny #9
September 4, 2022
I was laying on the floorStretching my coreI had something in store‘Cause I knew she wanted moreShe walked through the doorAnd I counted to
Looking for the schizophrenia posts that were originally at this link? Click ‘Schizophrenia‘ above in the sub-navigation!
I was laying on the floorStretching my coreI had something in store‘Cause I knew she wanted moreShe walked through the doorAnd I counted to
I was in a high school production once. Before I went on stage, the stage manager said, “break a leg!” I replied, “Oh, my
Never trust a chartNever trust a fartNever trust your dickPosing as your heart
For those of us with big hearts and an internet connection, social media is a colosseum for us to combat each other in a
We continue to be relentlessly myopic in our good intentions — taking action to our future’s ruin. Policy makers need to adopt a hacker
The best way to induce meaningful change in the world is to relinquish yourself to the prospect that it’s a complete waste of time
People like us do things like this
I’ve got a product that you don’t wanna miss
For a small price you can buy happiness
‘Til it bleeds
God finds a way to speak to us as long as we practice an intention of listening.
You can tell a blind skeptic they sit at the base of a mountain, but they will never believe your sight until they climb
A life without pain by choice leaves behind a world unexplored. A life with pain without choice leaves behind not a world, but a
Take a walk on the street
On your lowly peasant feet
Walk 10 miles more
To find what’s in store
When the houses get big and the sidewalks
A man walks into a bar, orders his beer, flips his coaster over to the blank side and gets out a pen. He asks
We scoff at primitive ancient societies for sacrificing life and limb to the gods for a good harvest. I wonder if the future will
Make our muscles bolder as we keep pushin’ boulders
We will never die
Pop my shoulder like we’re never gettin’ older
We will never die
The world’s gettin’
What did the long haul driver say to his truck after it successfully herded sheep? “That’ll do rig, that’ll do.”
The only way to stand out is to fully commit to a meaningful paradigm shift on conventional thinking.
Schizophrenic people when they forget their meds: “I’m losing my grip on reality” First-time home buyers when housing bubble pops: “I’m losing my gripe
We can make the world a better place not with sacrifice, but with finding & being our true selves. Find & being your true
A man can change his entire socioeconomic status with a $20 bill in the right thrift store. —Hipster Mick Travis
If you are like me and love nerding out about self-care, artistic expression, technology, and trying your best to balance your rampant cynicism with an equal measure of rampant silliness, I think you’ll vibe with what I do here.
I will only send updates that I am completely convinced will be valuable to you. I respect your time by respecting my time. I don’t send frivolous bullshit.
Wow, Ian, your posts are mostly shit.
LOL. Yup. They are. If you don't want to scroll through endless.. shitposts, well...
You can scroll to the top and click on a category that's more appealing to you. Most of my other content is in the Poetry and Schizophrenia categories
Ugh... I don't want to have to scroll ALL the way up. My fingers hurt from scrolling your shit already!
Wow, thanks Ian. You're my hero!
I know you're not actually saying that, and this is just a silly piece of the website that is shoving those words in your mouth, but you're welcome.
Speaking of shoving things into other things, why not let me shove emails into your inbox by signing up to my newsletter where I send updates about my non-shitty content?
📓 💻 🎮
Welcome to my little corner of the internet. 😊 ❤️
Brave Verified Creator
Sorry, sorry! I just thought since you've been on this site for longer than average, you might hear me out?
Why do you do this to me, Ian...
Okay, okay, I'll be quick! I have a newsletter to keep you up-to-date on my content and projects. If my stuff tickles your pickle, help us both out by subscribing!
Also, I don't do anything shady or aggressive with your email address. I'll only send you the good stuff and won't share your email with any person/provider that isn't working for me to serve you better.
'Serve me better.' What deliciously vague jargon. Is this where you pretend to be me and you make me respond with a contrived form of consent because you're bold enough to assume this cute little chat interface gimmick is enough to actually get me to sign up?
Ummm... uhhh... ahh... Sign up and get exclusive discounts and early access!!!! Come ooooon! Induced scarcity is fun!
...alright, well, I'll leave it up to you.
Like this nav? It does what every marketing-oriented web designer will tell you not to do: shove as many things in your face as I can!
