Sexual Architecture

I feel so at odds
With your concrete reinforcing rods
I feel just like
A load-bearing dyke

My feelings aren't what they seem
Once I look at your big steel beam
You're like a seductress
With your thrust out buttress

My heart roamed aimlessly
Until I saw your masonry
Loving you a million
Looking at your pavilion

My heart is set on fire
Looking at your gothic spire
My desire needs no proof
Simply see my eyes looking at your thatched roof

Putting my loins in a fuss
Gazing upon your truss
I can no longer carry on this charade
As I look past your facade

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Subscribe to be notified of new posts & the occasional news

AGHKGH! [email protected]&# OFF POPUP!

Sorry, sorry! I just thought since you've been on this site for longer than average, you might hear me out?

Why do you do this to me, Ian...

Okay, okay, I'll be quick! I have a newsletter to keep you up-to-date on my content and projects. If my stuff tickles your pickle, help us both out by subscribing!

Also, I don't do anything shady or aggressive with your email address. I'll only send you the good stuff and won't share your email with any person/provider that isn't working for me to serve you better.

'Serve me better.' What deliciously vague jargon. Is this where you pretend to be me and you make me respond with a contrived form of consent because you're bold enough to assume this cute little chat interface gimmick is enough to actually get me to sign up?

Ummm... uhhh... ahh... Sign up and get exclusive discounts and early access!!!! Come ooooon! Induced scarcity is fun!


...alright, well, I'll leave it up to you.

Ian's Creations

Poetry

From innocent witticisms to performative wokeness to outright vulgarity.

Schizophrenia Blog

Tips and tricks for managing mental illness, plus stories of living with schizophrenia.

The Meme Hotline

Serving dad jokes over automated voice and meme text messages via SMS completely toll-free!

Enderbook

The social app for Minecrafters. Share creations, follow friends, set up trades, & live chat.

Art & NFTs

Much like the poetry, another vehicle for humor, social commentary, & occasional beauty.

Personal Blog & Project Updates

Like everyone else on social media, I've been deluded into thinking my opinions matter.

Objektiv Digital

Making websites for successful local businesses. The most effective one-man-agency you'll likely ever find.

Like this nav? It does what every marketing-oriented web designer will tell you not to do: shove as many things in your face as I can!